By Juliette Owens

As summer winds down, families face the challenge of reorienting children back into
school routines.

For many, this period involves the usual protests and complaints, as children resist returning to their structured schedules and time away from home.
However, some families face a more serious issue known as school refusal, making the
back-to-school transition particularly taxing on the entire family.

What is School Refusal?

School refusal, also referred to as school avoidance, refers to any kind of significant
absenteeism accompanied by severe emotional distress. While not a formal diagnosis,
it is a symptom associated with other mental health conditions, such as anxiety,
depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder.

Children exhibiting school refusal may demonstrate avoidance behaviors in various
ways, such as lateness and refusing to get out of bed or leaving school early and acting
out during class. Once a child discovers an effective method of avoidance, it can
escalate into a more persistent issue.

Distress associated with attending school can manifest in different ways, varying from
child to child. Some may report physical symptoms of headaches or stomach aches,
increased depression, anxiety, or aggression, and resistance to getting ready for
school.

School Refusal vs. Truancy
It can be challenging for parents to distinguish between school refusal and truancy, as
both involve a child missing school. However, the underlying motivations and emotional
responses are notably different, and understanding these differences is essential for
providing appropriate support.

Truancy is often associated with older teenagers and is typically driven by external
factors such as boredom, rebellion, or the influence of peers. In these cases, the
avoidance of school is not due to emotional struggles, but a desire to seek out more
enjoyable activities.

Though truancy can sometimes be a form of acting out or asserting
independence, it lacks the severe emotional distress surrounding school attendance
seen in school refusal.

School avoidance is rooted in significant mental health concerns that require
professional attention. A child experiencing school refusal is not avoiding school for the
sake of fun or rebellion; instead, they are overwhelmed by fear or discomfort at the
thought of attending school. For these children, school is a source of distress that they
feel unable to cope with, leading to a strong emotional and physical reaction.

What Parents Can Do

It’s important to practice active listening to understand the reasons for school
avoidance. School can be intimidating due to a child’s fears of bullying, social isolation,
public speaking, or failure. Recognizing that your child is not making their situation
harder on purpose is important and allows your family to productively help as a unit.

Consistency is key for routine, rewards, and punishments! Working with your child to
create a morning routine that can be followed consistently will aid in developing a sense
of predictability and control.

The consequences for school refusal should be clear and
consistently applied. Equally, positive behaviors should always be recognized and
praised, reinforcing the desired behavior for the future.

Creating a comprehensive support system is vital in helping your child overcome the
underlying issue of school refusal. Work with your child’s school to develop a plan that
addresses their anxiety and facilitates school attendance. An outpatient mental health
center, such as North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center, can address the
underlying issues while advocating for accommodations at school to make the
environment more manageable.

Know that your family is not alone. School refusal is a growing challenge, with rates
rising by 5% partly due to the disruptions caused by the Covid-19 pandemic in which
kids missed out on vital socialization, creating higher levels of anxiety when faced with
large groups of their peers. However, with understanding, support, and the right
resources, your family can navigate this difficult period and help your child successfully
reenter the school environment.