There is so much one learns when shopping nowadays. I’m sure that shopping was not quite this educational years ago.

Let’s take today as an example. I was faced with the benign task of going to one of those big box stores to buy new sheets and pillows, one of those sponge racks you use in the kitchen sink and a butter dish. Little did I think I would be in for a real education on the way life is. Now buying those four items certainly doesn’t require a Ph.D.

Off I went, nice and early to wander about within the big box store and find the desired items. Many years ago, one would enter a store, find some human being who worked within the store and ask for help in finding the items in question. Those days are long gone, and I knew I would have to find these four little items on my own.

It took me quite a while, but I did manage to locate three of the four items without undue aggravation. So, I threw them in my big shopping cart and headed for the checkout counter to discover that this big box store had gotten wise to that special cost-saving device of installing many self-checkout machines. Of course, having shopped in big box supermarkets for the last few years, I was not overly befuddled with the task of self-checkout.

I did that pretty well and only once was I chastised by the machine to “Please place the checked out items in the bagging area. Please place the checked out item in the bagging area. Please place the checked out item in the bagging area.” This did not upset me too badly because I noticed with great delight that this store was not going to charge me money to use their bags. Wow, that was a nice surprise to me and let me calm down about the argument I had with the machine about where and when to place my checked-out items.

I loaded all my items into three separate big bags rather than stuffing everything into two bags since these bags were free. Happy as a clam, I proceeded to the exit doors with receipt in hand since there was a big guy waiting there who would check to see if I had stolen the pillows or the butter dish. But to my surprise instead of handing him the receipt, I heard the clamor of bells announcing that something was amiss.

As the security guard looked through my three big bags, he soon discovered that I had not had the theft guard tag removed from my new sheets. I explained to him that the machine I had interacted with failed to tell me about this issue. The guard just pointed me back inside to wait on a long line to have the little theft guard tag removed. And that is when I had my learning experience during my shopping day. You see since there was only two employees handling this long line, I had plenty of time to think about things.

Sure, the other people on the line were just as mad as me since we were also stuck in this big box store waiting to return something that was malfunctioning. But in between me listening to them mutter I got to thinking about the wonderful marriage between big business and computers. You see it all started back in the mid 1980s with telephone prompts. You may recall with fondness back in the 1970s when you called up some business and got to talk to a person. That ended pretty fast and we now must endure “Please listen carefully as our prompts have recently changed.” That is kind of like hearing “Please watch carefully as I’m about to punch you in the face.” OK, thanks for the warning.

The use of phone prompts was just the beginning. Over the last 40 years we slowly have witnessed the disappearance of humans in almost all phases of life. Supermarkets, big box stores, banks, the list goes on and on. And the hapless customers, like you and me, have no real power in this formula so we just keep on keeping on. Eventually we are sure to see robots serving us in restaurants and probably robots cooking the meals with great aplomb.

Over time, my profession of psychotherapy will be a thing of the past as well, just like in the 1971 George Lucas film “THX 1138.” The main character was played by Robert Duval and when he felt overanxious, confused, or nauseatingly depressed, he would go into a confessional booth and talk to the computer “OMM 0000,” who listened and then instructed him to “Work hard, increase production, prevent accidents and be happy” to which the Duval character throws up and goes back to his apartment.

And this is the way it is. Folks are filled with anomie, a growing sense of disconnection, paranoia and above all anger, lots of anger. Just like me and the folks in that big box store who were waiting on that long line to be helped by some under-paid teenager who looked just as confused as the rest of us.

I am certain that the reason marijuana was made legal was just as in” THX 1138’ and “Brave New World” it is necessary to keep the masses calm, non-thinking, happy and in a non-revolt mode. And so, it goes with the process quickening by the week. All hail this perfect marriage of the corporations and the computer. Cost savings galore, no payroll to speak of. So, what if the customers are all a little peeved. They’ll get over it. As I said at the outset, shopping can be a very educational experience. It’s just too bad that the education must be so grim.